Today will conclude our "unit" on standpoint theory, which is a great way to follow the leadership of people who are historically marginalized.

Katie H recently offered the perfect example of a “proximate” moment where you want to scream:

Our 17 year old foster "child" G (herself a mom who had just crossed the southern border into the US with her infant daughter) put coffee, milk, and sugar into her baby's bottle every morning. I could hardly handle it! I had all the feelings of "knowing better" or doing things "the right way" festering in my head. Sometimes it feels like getting proximate can bring out the worst in me... which is frustrating. But maybe also kind of the point??

It’s all here: Differing cultural norms! Parenting advice! White-savior anxiety! A CAFFEINATED BABY!

Stefon SNL "this place has everything" GIF

bell hooks said that theory can “be a healing place,” and I want to take that seriously. Not every TP roll is right for every moment, but I wonder whether standpoint theory can help us—practically—in the hair-raising moments like Katie’s.

So: I conducted a little experiment and then emailed with Katie about it. Here’s an edited/condensed version of our correspondence:

Michelle
OK, my working hypothesis is that ST isn’t a silver bullet in these situations…but that routinely picking up the ST toilet-paper roll can gradually adjust our posture from “holy hell this one person is doing something insane” (which, as we know, can slide into “‘They’ All Must Be Insane”) to “huh, what’s going on here, and who understands the sides of it that I can’t see?”

So, I think one ST-informed approach to the baby-coffee situation could be to think bigger about migrant nutrition. I googled “immigrant babies nutrition USA” and scrolled to find websites run by migrant-advocacy groups. In under 10 minutes, I learned that

  • many migrant families—including those who pick fruits and vegetables—cannot afford fruits and vegetables;
  • SNAP benefits have not been extended to most undocumented immigrants;
  • partly as a result, undocumented migrants in the USA lean toward cheap, high-calorie, filling foods that give them energy.

As a group, migrants can see the underside of our food system, in which they’re providers but not beneficiaries. (This, btw, is where that "group, not individual" element of ST comes into play. ST wouldn't say that every individual migrant has magical insight about migrant nutrition problems and solutions...in that case, the upshot would be "your foster teen knows best ¯\_(ツ)_/¯." ST would say that, when migrants study their situation together, they devise uniquely good solutions.)

Then, I think next practical steps could be:

  • Call your reps about nutrition for migrants. Explain your experience and advocate for practical nutrition education and support for migrants.
  • Feel free to tell G about potential harms of caffeine and sugar for babies, and help her learn alternatives. You know that you don’t contain All the Solutions, so you can offer that education strings-free.

Is this anything??? Is it practical? Or is it just too too?

Mariah: "I know it's over the top, but that's how festive I am"

Katie
OK. As for the baby-bottle troubleshooting, I feel a mixture of "is this overthinking it?" [ed note: big same, LOL] and "wow, this is such a good way to practically think and do something about it!"

I did a little research too and found a blog post where a Latina mom writes to other Latina moms about giving kids coffee. It was helpful for me to read her perspective on what a cultural norm it is in Latin America, yet how the research clearly demonstrates the harmful effects. I would love to hear more from her or other Latina women about how to approach this with moms.

I still don’t know if ST helps in that tricky moment. When I tried to tell G that caffeine has some negative effects on children, she didn’t seem interested. I didn't want to be overbearing or culturally insensitive, so I just dropped it.

Honestly, the idea of contacting my rep/trying to address migrant nutrition education seems more straightforward and less uncomfortable!

Michelle
Riiight. Maybe it’s a muscle that we have to build over time; only then can we use it in the moment?

I feel like if standpoint theory can merely help shift our posture from "aaaaaaaaaah" to "I might not fully understand how to solve these problems, but (1) they're often coming from systems and (2) the groups of people experiencing them have insight about how to solve them," it's worth something. Yes?

Katie
Yes, I think the idea about ST helping change our posture and ground us better is really good. Like maybe the more we try to use ST, our way of thinking/reacting to situations like this might slowly start to change. I might still feel the bristly impulse to judge or be shocked, but hopefully I would more quickly shift to becoming more humble, open to learning, thinking about what the people in the group I'm interacting with could teach me.

Michelle
THAT’S THE HOPE.

Katie
I would love to hear other examples and applications too…

Michelle
Haha ok, twist my arm!

  • When frustrated and confounded by the many problems and inequities in urban school systems, go to advocacy groups like Black Women for a Better Education, who are uniquely able to analyze problems and propose solutions.
  • Listen to the people experiencing the underside of global conflicts (their stories can be difficult to find, but advocacy groups work to collect and share them).
  • An org called Foster Care Alumni of America is engaged in all kinds of advocacy that I wouldn’t have known to think of. By people who’ve been kids in the system—who have insight that most foster parents and advocates can’t personally access but need.

THANK YOU, KATIE. I love and admire you so dang much! Use the comments to send her some love and extra energy for this week...as of 3:00 am today she has a new lil migrant sweetheart as a houseguest.

OK, what do y’all think? Is ST a posture-maker or a practical aid, or both?